Transplant Day +67

Greetings friends!!!

Well, I think I am starting to feel almost "normal" again. I am still having stomach problems but my doctor gave me some pain killers that have helped tremendously. They still can't find anything wrong in there though.

I had another PET and CT scan on the 16th and there wasn't even a hint of the lymphoma! WOO-HOO!!! My doctor still wants me to have some low dose radiation just to make sure the cancer is completely destroyed!!! I will have treatments once a day, 5 days a week for 3 weeks, which is gonna be tough finding someone to watch the kids for those times. But we'll figure it out.

I also had an ultra-sound done where the blood clot was, and it's still there. I have to have 6 more weeks of blood thinner shots and then another ultra-sound. The doctor said if it was still there, he would be "done with it", which is kinda weird because if it's something that he can be "done with" why are they treating it at all? I will ask for an explaination when I see him again if the clot is still there.

I won't be posting as much here unless something major comes up, but I will update the blog every once-in-a-while.

Thanks again to you all for helping me and my family through this trying time.

Peace

Transplant Day +60

Hey all. Well they did an endoscopy and saw some inflamation in my stomach. They took a biopsy of it and it came back as normal. I am still having stomach pains, and they won't give me any pain killers for now. I wish they would have found something, as something has to be causing this abdominal pain.

I go back in on Monday for another PET scan and depending on what that shows I will or will not get some radiation treatments under my left arm. Mostly likely I will get the treatments.

Okay then, that is all.

Peace

Transplant Day +55

Nothing new to report during the last few days. Still having stomach issues and eating troubles. Tomorrow I am going to have an upper endoscopy, they are gonna stick a tiny camera down my throat and look at my stomach to see if they can find the cause of my discomfort. I hope they find something so it can get treated and I can feel good again.

Other than this stomach thing I am doing great. I have been playing outside with the kids, jamming on my guitar and other things that were part of my normal life before cancer.

Peace

Transplant Day +49

Hello again!!!

Well, nothing new to write about for me. Megan is back on call, so that is going to help our finances a lot. The boys and Abbys' last day of school and day care is Thursday, so I have been playing the hell out of my guitar while I can!!

I hope you all are doing well!!!

Peace

Transplant Day +48

Hello y'all!

Things are going good for me. My colonoscopy was negative, nothing wrong there. I am still having some discomfort with my side and stomach, but I am learning to live with it. Next Monday I am going to have an endoscopy, where they still a scope down my throat and have a look at my stomach. I hope they find something so it can get fixed!!!

Other than that I am doing well. I mowed the lawn today and hung out with my family instead of laying in bed all the time.

That is all for now!

Peace

Transplant Day +47

Can you believe that I am still having the same stomach problems? I can eat more now, but it's like I have this constant dull pain in my gut 24/7. I can't believe that the doctors cannot find anything wrong. I just want to feel good again, is that so wrong?

Peace

Transplant Day +46

Hi all,

I got some great news from my doctor today. The PET scan showed absolutely no cancer in my body!!! I am so relieved, thanks and glory and honor be to God the Father and His Wonderful Son Jesus Christ, even forever. I have been praying so hard for this, sometimes to the point of tears. I know I am not "out-of-the-woods" yet, but it's good to know that right now I am cancer free.

I have to wait until Monday to get the colonoscopy results, and I am still having troubles with my stomach. It's really wierd that they can't find the cause of my discomfort. As you may of realized, I can be a worry-wort at times, but I am hoping this is nothing serious.

Peace to you all!

Transplant Day +45

Hi all,

Well, all my blood work was normal and the x-ray didn't show anything either. My doctor has scheduled a colonoscopy and a PET scan for tomorrow (Friday 5/30). I am very scared of that PET scan, that it will show the cancer is still there and maybe even spread and is part of my stomach troubles. I just can't get that thought out of my head, no matter how hard I try. And what sucks is that my doctor scheduled the appointment to go over the results on Monday, so I'll have to wait all week-end to find out what it shows.

Peace

Transplant Day +44

Well, still having the same problems with my stomach. I don't know what to think, kinda worried. Today I was able to force myself to get up and around in the house. I actually played my guitar for a couple hours, man do I need to practice more!

Peace

Transplant Day +43

Well my doctor has scheduled some blood tests and an x-ray of my abdomen on Thursday to see if he can pin point the troubles I've been having. I sure hope I don't end up back in the hospital again. Man, I am really getting frustrated, I just want to feel good, ya know?

Anyhoot, I hope you all are doing good and thanks for your support.

Peace

Transplant Day +42

Hello all,

I am still having the stomach problems. Mostly nasious and not able to eat very much, but also very tired. All I have been doing the past few days is laying in bed.

Megan's sister Jena and her kids and my sister Kim and her kids came over for supper today. They grilled hot dogs and brats. I forced myself to go sit outside for about 20 minutes and watched the kids play in the back yard, then I was able to get a brat and some baked beans in me. After that my stomach acted up again and I ended up back in bed.

Goodnight all!!!

Transplant Day +41

Hello,

Things are pretty much the same. I guess I am glad they aren't getting worse. I have mostly been lying in bed all day and night. I sure hope I start feeling better soon.
That's all for now.

Peace

Transplant Day +40

Hi all,

Well, my stomach troubles are back. I can't eat alot without getting nauseous, I feel worn down again and I just can't get comfortable no matter what I try. Today we had cake and ice cream for Megan's birthday (it's on Monday), well, they had cake and ice cream, I couldn't even take a bite. I guess I'll be going back to the doctor on Tuesday, if not before.

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.

Peace

Transplant Day +39

Hi all ,

Today was a great day. My stomach felt better, I was able to eat more and I actually got to play my electric guitar for about an hour. It felt great to play it again after so long. Megan and the kids all went to the park and had a great time as well.
That's all for now,

Peace

Transplant Day +38

Well, I called the doctor today about my stomach troubles. He seems to think it has something to do with heartburn. He told me to take 2 extra-strength Tums a day and if things are still messed up to call him again on Tuesday. I hope it works because I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired you wouldn't even know!

Peace

Transplant Day +37

Hello frineds. I am still having the stomach problems. Still upset, not able to eat much and feeling nasious. I will give it one more day. If things aren't better by tomorrow, I will call my doctor and talk to him about this. I hope I don't have to get admitted into the hospital again.
I'll keep you posted.

Peace

Transplant Day +36

Hi all. Things are good. I have had some stomach issues lately, upsey stomach feeling, can't eat alot without feeling full or getting nasious. I'll see if it will get better in a day or 2. Othert than that things are going good.

Peace

Transplant Day +35

Well, nothing new to report. Things are going well and I am grateful for that.

Transplant Day +34

Hi peeps!!!

Today was another good day. I was able to play more baseball with the twins. I had so much fun. I was also able to mow some of the back yard, I was having trouble with the mower and my neighbor came over with his mower and asked if he could finish the mowing for me. I was like "Are you sure?" He is in his 70's I would guess, and he said he really wanted to finish for me so I said OK.

After supper Megan and I also took the kids to a park for awhile. I can't wait to get back to normal. I forgot how much I missed my old life, it was great and I thank God for blessing me with such a wonderful life. I only hope and pray that I will have that life again soon.

Peace

Transplant Day +33

Greetings,

Today was fabulous!!! I forced myself to get outside. I was able to play baseball with my twin boys and niece and nephew. It was great. The boys LOVED it. I only played for about half an hour, then I got pretty tired out, but that was the best 1/2 hour I've had in a long time!!!!

I think I am going to have to force myself like I did today and things will start to slowly come back to me like before the transplant.

Thanks again to all my family and friends for all your support and prayers.

Peace

Transplant Day +32

Hi all,

Nothing new to report. Still tire easily and not quite eating like I used to, but things are getting better. I hope all is well with you all.

Peace

Transplant Day +31

Greetings friends, well I found out that I'll need the blood thinner shots for awhile. The plan is to have the shots for 6 weeks and then go in for an ultra-sound to check the clot. Other than that things are getting back to normal except my energy levels.

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers, they will be eternally remembered.

Peace

Transplant Day +30

Not much new to report. My appetite is getting back to normal but I can't eat a whole lot at once. I still get pretty tired but I think that's getting better. Tomorrow I see a blood clot specialist to see if I still need the blood thinners.

Peace

Transplant Day +29

Hi all. Nothing new to report. Still having trouble with my energy levels, just want to sleep 24/7. Hopefully as it warms up I can make myself get outside with the kids and ease my way back into being active again. My appetite is gettting much better, but still not quite back to
normal. Just waiting until Thursday when I see the blood clot specialist to find out how much longer I need those blood thinner shots. They don't hurt, but it kinda sucks having to get them everyday.

Transplant Day +28

I had my first appointment with my lymphoma doctor today for the first time in quite awhile. He said that things are looking good and he is happy with everything he sees. He wants to do another PET Scan, CT and blood tests on day +60 and maybe do some low dose radiation treatments depending on what the tests show. There was one "stubborn" spot under my left armpit that he wants the radiation done on, basically for overkill.

Also, we were able to get a prescription for my blood thinner shot so Megan can give it to me at home instead of going in everyday just to get a shot. My next appointment is on Thursday to check the blood clot and see how much longer I will need the blood thinners.

My appetite is getting better slowly, but I still get so fricken' tired I could sleep for days.

I wish you all the best and thank you again for your thoughts and prayers.

Transplant Day +27

Nothing exciting to report today. I just went in and got my blood thinner shot. Still not eating much and still extremely exhausted. Feeling a little better though.

Transplant Day +26

Not much to report today. I went in for my blood thinner shot. Still extremely tired and have no appetite. I was a bit nausious so I took a pill that's supposed to help that, but I was too late. I lost it. But I know I have been very lucky as far as that goes. I think, other than the fatigue, the side effects I have been dealing with are quite minimal.

Tonight I am going out to see my old band STIR at the North Star. I can't wait, they are really, really good and I haven't heard them in quite awhile. Maybe I'll see some of ya there!!!!

Thanks to you all and peace.

Transplant Day +25

Well, they took out my central line today. It went much smoother than I expected. The only pain I felt was when she cut the sutures. Then she just pulled on it a few times and boom it came right out.

I still have that blood clot to contend with but am getting blood thinner shots to help get rid of it. My blood levels are all doing great and on Monday I will start seeing my regular doctor less often, I won't have to go in every single day for blood work, Whoo Hoo!

I am still having trouble with my appetite and energy levels, I sure hope they get back to normal soon.

Well, that it is all for now.

Transplant Day +24

Hello friends,

Tomorrow I am going to have an ultra sound on my central line. They are planning to remove it in the next few days. All my blood levels are continuing to improve and the doctors are very happy about that. The levels related to my liver are still quite high but they are coming down. The doctors aren't sure what happened to cause them to go up so high but they don't seem to concerned. I am just glad they are coming down.

My appetite is getting a little better, I can eat somethings without too much trouble. I am still always tired however and have no energy to do anything. It takes as much as I've got to even post these blogs, but I want to keep it going.

Have a great days friends!

Transplant Day +23

Not much new to report, The ultra sound on my liver looks totally normal, so there not quite sure what to thing about those enzyme levels. I am still extremely tired and have no appetite. hopefully both of those will get better soon as I really miss getting outside and playing with my kids.

Transplant Day +22

Well, another boring day. They forgot to give me my blood thinner shot when I went in for my blood work. ID10Ts. They want to do an ultra-sound on my liver tomorrow. Apparently one marker in my blood work from today came back high. Normal is like 50-115 and mine came back over 500. I am a bit worried about that because it is so frickin' high. Olay I need sleep now. Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers.

Transplant Day +21

Not much new going on. Still can't eat much, but my blood levels are completely normal, which means at this point the transplant was a success. It's really strange not having any appetite, hopefully it will come back soon.

Transplant Day +20

Greetings friends,

Things seem to be going much better, the diariah is gone but I am still having a hard time eating, just no appetite at all. I did manage to force down a pizza for supper though (WOOT! WOOT!). I think that puts my calorie count for the day at around 1,200. They want me to get at least 1,000 per day.

My blood counts continue to rise, I think the only thing below normal are my platelets. Also, they are planning to take out my central line in the next few days but the blood clot won't come out with it, so I'll still need the blood thinner shots daily.

Things are getting better slowly, and I ask for your continued prayers for my family and I.

Thank you all so very much for all you've done for us.

Transplant Day +19

Went in for my blood tests and everything looks good, the levels are nearing normal. I am still extremely exhausted all the time, nothing seems to help that. I still have to force myself to eat, but mostly just chug some high calorie drinks like Boost, Slim Fast, Carnation Instant Breakfast....because I can get them down and they don't make me feel nausious.

I think they are planning to take out my central line in a few days so that'd be great. I still have that blood clot to contend with, and the pain is still not gone. But it's so good to be home!!!

I think I need to re-learn the guitar, know any good teachers???

Only 81 days to go before my next scan!!!!!

Thank you all again.

Transplant Day +18

Well, they let me go home today!!!! I am still extremely tired, have absolutely no appetite and still in some pain mostly from where the blood clot is, but it feels so good to be home you have no idea!!! The pain meds they have given me don't help much so I'm gonna ask for something different tomorrow.

Thanks again friends and family, I couldn't do this without you all!

Transplant Day +17

Hi all, I am still pretty tired and have no appetite what so ever, but things are slowly turning around and I think the worst is over (I hope anyway).

I got to get out of this place and attend the Pancake Dinner Event that the boys' school put on for us. I was only able to stay for about 1/2 hour, then I got so tired I had to get back to the hospital. But it was good to get away and see some friends and family that I haven't seen in a very long time. Thank you all who attended the event, it seems to have been a hugh success. I wish I could have stayed for the whole thing but I was just so exhausted I was falling asleep at the table we were sitting at!

Also thanks to Mrs. D, everyone at Churchill and all of the volunteers for putting the event on for my family. Thank you really doesn't quite do it justice, but Megan and I will never forget your caring and generosity in helping my family get through this difficult time.

Transplant Day +16

My current state can be summed up in 3 words:

Weak and Powerless :-(

Thank you all for your love and caring.

Transplant Day +15

It's Megan again. Still too tired. Eating seems to be the last thing he wants to do. nothing really sounds good. They still have him on IV nutrition and hydration.

Transplant Day +14

Megan here, Steve has been too tired to update the blog. Nothing new to report really. They have him on a soft diet so he is attempting to eat.

Transplant Day +13

Greetings friends!!!

Today was a wonderful day. My 3 beautiful children came up to visit. It just made my whole day. I haven't seen them since I got admitted back about 11 days ago. I love them so much and this lymphoma and stem cell transplant has made me realize the many changes I need to make in my lifestyle to help them grow up to be happy, healthy well functioning adults.

Also, my niece Jen called. That also made my day. I haven't seen her in such a very long time and miss her dearly. I was so nice to hear her voice, we had a great talk.

More good news, the removed my N/G Tube this morning and started letting me eat some mild, soft foods. The diahriah seem to be getting better as well.

Thank you God and your Wonderful Son Jesus Christ for such a good day.


Hemoglbin 10.4
WBC 3.4
Platelets 38

Transplant Day +12

Greetings all!!!

I just wanted to make a quick post, I am extremely tired. I wanted to apologize mainly to my beautiful wife Megan. You have been so strong throughout all of this, and done so much that I am amazed by you and your spirit. I now, without a doubt, know that I am the luckiest man on the face of this earth to have you and your love, devotion and strength. I do not think that I could get through this without you. I am sorry Megan, that for the past few days I have let my spirit get so down and started to feel sorry for myself. I am sorry that you have had to see me in this shape, whimpering and whining, complaining about everything under the sun, and you already worrying so much, spending so much time here, then having to go home and deal with life. Well my fighting spirit is back and I am ready to do whatever it takes to see this through!!!!

I promise you Megan, when we get through this and I am back up on my feet, you are going to feel like a Princess. I am going to give you the best life you could have ever imagined and make you feel like the luckiest woman on earth, I PROMISE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

To all friends and family, thank you so much for your prayers and/or well wishes and positive thoughts. I know that they have carried me through some very difficult times and will continue to do so. THANK YOU ALL AND GOD BLESS.


Hemoglobin 10.6
WBC 3.1
Platelets 41

Transplant Day +11

GREAT SONG---"Zzyzx Rd." By STONE SOUR

I don't know how else to put this. It's taken me so long to do this, I'm falling asleep and I can't see straight. My muscles feel like a melee, my body's curled in a U-shape. I put on my best but I'm still afraid.

Propped up by lies and promises, saving my place as life forgets. Maybe its time I saw the world. I'm only here for a while, but patience is not my style, and I'm so tired that I gotta go.

What am I supposed to hide now? What am I supposed to do? Did you really think I wouldn't see this through? Tell me I should stick around for you, tell me I could have it all. I'm still too tired to care and I gotta go.

I get to go home in one week, but I leaving home in three weeks. They throw me a bone just to pick me dry. I'm following suit and directions, I crawl up inside for protection. I'm told what to do and I don't know why. I'm over existing in limbo, I'm over the myths and placebos. I don't really mind if I just fade away. I'm ready to live with my family, I'm ready to die in obscurity.

'Cause I'm so tired that I gotta go.

Where am I supposed to hide now? What am I suppose to do? You still don't think I'm going see this through. Tell me I'm a part of history, tell me I can have it all. I'm still to tired to care and I gotta go.

Hemoglobin 10.2

WBC 2.3

Plateletes 49

Transplant Day +10

I feel like I'm dying.


Hemoglobin 10.0
WBC 2.3
Platelets 70

Transplant Day +9

I don't remember much of day 9. My wife thinks that's a good thing ;) Lots of narcotics.


Hemoglobin 8.4
WBC 1.2
Platelets 27

Transplant Day +8

DAY +8 TUESDAY 4/22/08

I'm sorry,
I'm just..... its starting to hit me like a ummmm,
ummmm a 2 ton heavy thing.


Hemoglobin 8.2
WBC .6
Platelets 14

Transplant Day +7

Hasn't been a fun few days for Steve. I thought I would update his blog tonight, as he is in rough shape. He had an NG tube placed today. They sucked out 5 liters of fluid. Probably more like 6 liters by now. He will have the tube in for a few days to give his gut a rest. He had gained 10 pounds since the 17th. Once they sucked out the 5 liters, he had lost 7 pounds.

I hope he feels up to writing himself tomorrow.

Hemoglobin 91

WBC 0.3

Platelets 19

Day +6

Chemical boy says:

Owwwwwwwww. I'm in too much pain to do this today. Sorry.


Hemoglobin 9.0
WBC .2
Platelets 19

Day +5

Chemical brother says:

Thank you to Megan's family and Jenny Lee for taking care of the kids so Megan can stay with me the past 3 nights. It's been wonderful to have her here through out all of the sickness that has been happening. (barfing...........) Who else but your soul mate can sit next to you while you vomit all day long? They started feeding me through my central line tonight so I can start getting calories. Steak and eggs, yum!! I would like to leave you with a quote from one of my favorite artists, Alice Cooper: "Wake me gently, if you can. Wake me gently, just touch my hand. Wake me gently, from my sleep. Cause where I'm at is where I want to leave."


Hemoglobin 7.3
WBC .1
Platelets 29

Day +4

Steve say's:

Can't imagine things getting any worse. Although I know they will. Please pray for me and my family. Help us through this difficult time. (Hold on, I think he just feel asleep...)

I layed in bed all day, tried to keep the pain away. I got about 20 calories in today. My goal is 1000. Nothing stays in, or down. I delveloped a fever today. Nice cherry to top it all off.



Hemoglobin 12.1
WBC .2
Platelets 48

Day + 3

This is Mrs. Chemo, reporting for the captain. He has temporarily abandoned ship. Shitting blood and being loaded up on narcotics will do that. The morning started out pretty rough with pain and vomiting. I took him in to the hospital and they admitted him right away. We are both a little scared, but he is where he needs to be right now. He's getting transfusions, drugs, hydration, monitoring...Hopefully they can find the source of the pain and bleeding tomorrow. I guess the CT scanner took the night off???

Blood counts for today are:

Hemoglobin 12.1
WBC 0.2
Plateletes: 23

Transplant Day +2

TRANSPLANT DAY +2 WEDNESDAY 4/16/08

I think I’m traveling at a high rate of speed towards a 2-ton heavy thing. Besides the nausea, mouth sores, heartburn, hiccups, diarrhea and my counts continuing their freefall, I’m doing great!!! The transplant coordinator said I have 3 main jobs to do to get through this hard time:

1. Hydrate as much as possible
2. Caloric intake of at least 1,900 calories per day
3. Stay active

Well right now the hydration and caloric intake is going right through me. As far as staying active, I’m too tired to care and I gotta go.


Hemoglobin 10.6
WBC 0.3
Plateletes 61

Transplant Day +1

TRANSPLANT DAY +1 TUESDAY 4/15/08

First day home. Side effects are getting stronger. I get these strange hiccups, sometimes 1 or 2 at once, but I counted 15 in a row one time. With the hiccups comes severe heartburn. Nausea is controlled pretty well with meds. I have been having some pretty bad diahria, which is not improving. They tell me these side effects are from the preservative that my stem cells were stored with and my body is getting it out these ways.

It’s good to be home and I feel pretty crappy, but I know things could be worse. My blood counts keep dropping, which in turn tires me out and makes the side effect stronger. I am so not looking forward to the next 7 – 14 days!!


Hemoglobin 10.1
WBC 2.4
Plateletes 82

Transplant Day 0

DAY O MONDAY 4/14/08

Well, it is done. Pretty simple really. They froze the stem cells after they collected them and today they just thawed the bags out in warm water, put them in 7 different syringes and slowly put them back.

No real problems with side effects, but I was told that in about a week to 10 days the intense chemo will really start kicking my butt. Megan was here with me and 2 nurses. All the nurses and doctors have been very nice and I give them thanks. Also, most importantly, thanks be to God and His Glorious Son for helping my family through this phase of treatment without any major side effects. Last night they gave me some steroids which kept me up until about 5:30am, my mind was racing and I think I got maybe 3-4 hours of sleep.

I am hoping to start composing some music about my entire cancer experience, starting with Diagnosis and ending with Cure, with everything else in between. As my mind was racing last night, the song Hey There Delilah came to mind so I rewrote the lyrics. Maybe I’ll add some punch to it with some electric guitar, bass and drums when I am feeling up to it.

Here it is:

HEY THERE LYMPHOMA

Music by The Plain White Tees
Lyrics by Captain Chemo

Hey there Lymphoma

What's it like inside my body?

Hope you know that you are leaving soon

And I’m not very sorry

Yes it’s true

My light shines bright it out shines you

You know it's true

Hey there Lymphoma

Don't be messing with my family

They’re all standing here beside me

Megan, Jacob, Josh and Abby

Close their eyes

They pray at night for your demise

And so do I

Oh you know I do hate thee

Oh for what you’ve done to me

Oh you know I do hate thee

Because you’ve hurt my family

Hurt my family

Hey there Lymphoma I know times are getting hard

Just be thankful that you’re not a man

You’d be bloodied, bruised and scarred

And most of all I’d laugh my ass off as you fall

Then watch you crawl

Hey there Lymphoma

There’s not so much left to say

If every person that has crossed your path

Could beat you in this way

I'd help them all

Even more the harder you would fall

We'd have a ball

Oh you know I do hate thee

Oh for what you’ve done to me

Oh you know I do hate thee

Because you’ve hurt my family

15 tumors seems like a lot

But they've got pills and drugs and doc’s

I'd cut you out if I had no other way

Some people they might laugh at me

And I'll just laugh along you see

I hope that none of them will feel your pain

Lymphoma I can promise you

That by the time I’m through with you

My world will never ever be the same

And you're to blame

Hey there Lymphoma

I’m not sorry and I won’t miss you

Every time I take them to the park

I’ll need a box of tissues for my eyes

I can’t believe you made me cry

But I’m not sad to say goodbye

Hey there Lymphoma take a ride

Cause I’m alive

Oh you know I do hate thee

Oh for what you’ve done to me

Oh you know I do hate thee

Because you’ve hurt my family

Hurt my family

Hemoglobin 10.3

WBC 5.4

Platelets 118

Transplant Day -1

DAY -1 SUNDAY 4/13/08

Hey, hey, another great day. The nausea didn’t last long, but the fatigue is still there. I finished my chemo this morning at around 10:00am and then got to go home again!!! I just got back (I am a bit tardy, shhh, no one was at the desk when I snuck in). Tomorrow at 5:00am I will be given some hydration through IV for 4 hours. Between 9:30-10:00am my stem cells will be put back, then another 4 hours of IV fluids. As long as things go well I will be an out-patient after tomorrow, coming in every day for blood work and check-ups for awhile.

I am not too worried about the transplant. I am more concerned about the next body scan, whether it be in 1 month or 3 months or 6 months. I just wanna be rid of this horribly dreadful disease for ever. Thanks to all of my family and friends for the support, it means so much to Megan and I.

Peace,

Steven M.


Hemoglobin 10.3
WBC 3.1
Plateletes 130

Transplant Day -2

DAY -2 SATURDAY 4/12/08

Hi all! Another pretty good day. I am starting to get very tired and a bit nausious. My counts continue to drop. It’s almost time for my last “E” and “A” chemo cocktail, WOOT, WOOT!!! Megan, I am sorry I was an ass today, I know things are hard right now, and they are going to get worse before they get better. I promise to try and be more understanding with everything you’re doing and dealing with. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! And again, I am sorry.


Hemoglobin 10
WBC 1.7
Plateletes 140

Transplant Day -3

DAY -3 FRIDAY 4/11/08

Today was another good day. I am starting to feel more tired, but hey, it could be much worse. I was able to go home again today so that was really nice. I got a nap in and got to eat supper at home with my family. Not much else to report right now, just starting my evening chemo and watching game 2 of the MN Wild and Col. Avalance play-off hockey game. GO WILD!!!!


Hemoglobin 9.6
WBC 2.0
Plateletes 159

Transplant Day -4

DAY -4 THURSDAY 4/10/08

Not much to say about Day -4. Same “E” and “A” of “BEAM” and I feel fine. I did not sleep well again last night, and my blood counts are slowly coming down, but not enough to make me feel too bad yet. Abby was a bit sick and had to come home from day care so I played it safe and stayed in the hospital today. I am hoping to go home between treatments tomorrow.

Transplant Day -5

DAY -5 Wednesday 4/9/2008 8:20 PM

I would like to start this entry with saying a few thanks.

Firstly, thanks so much to our Glorious Father and Creator God and His Wonderful and Loving Son Jesus Christ. They have blessed me far more than I have ever deserved. These blessings include, but are not limited to the following:

My Beautiful Wife Megan. Thank you so much for all that you do. Words or even thoughts cannot express the love I have for you. Sorry for putting you through all this crap and for being a butt-head, cry-baby, jerk……I don’t know how you do all that you do and I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your love, courage and strength. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

My Three Children. Identical twin boys Jacob and Joshua, age 6, and sweet little Abby, age 3. They are my world, my life. I would do or give anything for them. I have never felt, or even knew such an intense and all consuming love existed until those twin Rolbiecki boys and their sister Abby came into my life.

My Parents. Both my parents are awesome and I don’t know how they put up with me through my teen years! There is nothing I could do or give them for all they’ve done for me. Mom, thanks for being such a kind and loving mom. Dad, you are, have always been and always will be my hero. I love you both so much words can’t describe.

My Brother and 4 Sisters. Even though we do not spend the time together like we use to, I want you all to know that I love so very much and wish we could spend more time together again. Maybe after Josh recovers from his surgery in July. Thank you so much for all you’ve done for my family and I this past year, it will never be forgotten.

My Incredible In-Laws. What can I say? Grammy, Jena and Rick, thanks so much for everything you've helped us out with in this difficult time, and even before it for that matter. I truly appreciate all that you have done for us and karma will find it's way to you all!!!

Nieces and Nephews. Sydney and Dylon, thanks for being such great kids and for all you've done for my entire family. I'll try and pay you back someday (after I win the Powerball!!) Christian and Mickey, thanks for your incredible hugs and love and for everything else you've done for us, again it would take a winning Poweball ticket to pay you back!!! Shaun, you're a great young man and I wish you the best. I miss seeing you though. Maybe after my recovery we can hook up a bit more often. Jennifer, I miss you so much and am so very proud of you. Thank you for the nice phone message you left me. I was going to call you tonight but I forgot my cell at home and can't call long distance from the hospital :-( I love you so much and can't wait to see you this July!!! Cassie, what can I say. You were heaven sent and words cannot describe the appreciation that my family has for everything you've done for us. Can't wait for your big day in July. We love you so much!

My Friends. I didn't really realize how wonderfully incredible my friends are until my diagnosis. My old band STIR will always be close to my heart, mostly because of that incredible guitarist they have (Carl... .Kobe, Cody?… um I forget his name, but trust me he’s phenomenal!). To all of my friends who’ve helped out spiritually, physically, emotionally or financially (and I know some of you have done more than just one of those), I am forever indebted to you all and consider myself to be extremely blessed to share this thing we call life with you all.

All of those eBayers. You people blew my mind. Total strangers helping me raise $$$ to ease the financial burden brought onto my family during this whole process. People from all across the US and even Canada sent checks, some couldn’t send any $$$ but sent prayers and well wishes instead. I even got some messages for advice from some who were recently diagnosed with the same cancer as I. Thank you all so much.

The Post Bulletin/KTTC/WCCO. Thank you for the attention you gave to my disease and eBay auction through your articles and Newscasts. My 2nd grade teacher, Ms. Shraggey (sp?), now Mrs. Berg, actually saw the KTTC spot and the next day she calls my house...WOW was that unreal! I couldn’t believe she’d remembered me after 34 years!!! But she did and she came over with class pictures. It was a great visit.

Last But Not Least, My Guitar Students. Every one of my 30 students, current and former, from age 6 to 60, are all incredible people and I count myself lucky to know you. Thank you all for your enduring patience throughout this incredibly rough battle that my family is going through. I miss all of you all and hope to be back at it sometime in August.

Okay, onto the transplant business. Today (and for the next 3 days) my regimen is the “E” and the “A” of the "BEAM" chemical cocktail for my chemo. I started at 8:00am and finished at 11:00am. Then I got to leave again – YAY!!! I have the same chemo again tonight from 8:00pm to 11:00pm. Then that continues over the next 3 days. I am feeling a bit tired but I think that’s more due to lack of sleep than side effects. I know there’s an extremely difficult and rough road ahead, but at least the chemo is going good so far – no ill effects yet!!! Update on that tomorrow.

Transplant Day -6

DAY -6 Tuesday 4/8/2008 10:05 PM

Today was a great day. I checked in at 8:00 am and started the “B” drug of the “BEAM” chemo regimen at 10:30am and finished it at 12:30pm. I was a little scared of how the drug may effect me as this is my first experience with “BEAM”. But today was great,the only side effect I felt was a pretty good headache. That was taken care of nicely by some pain meds.

I actually got to leave the hospital after the chemo. I went home and rested, then went with my wife to pick up the kids from day care and then out for pizza!!! That was wonderful as the worst part of this whole experience is being away from my family (who mean everything to me).

Tomorrow I get the “E” and the “A” chemos from 8am to 11am and then again from 8pm to 1pm. If I’m feeling good I’ll be able to leave between the treatments, which is awesome. I thought I’d be stuck in the hospital 24/7 through this “BEAM” chemo. What a nice surprise to be able to get away for some time.

My Pre-Transplant Life

Okay, so I had a pretty "normal" life up to the age of 20. I started playing guitar in 1984 at 17. I jammed with some great guys in a band called Cyanide and things were going pretty good until Sept. 1987. At that time I started having strange "falling spells". Whenever I would lose my balance my body would go stiff as a board and I would fall, without being able to break that fall. This went on for a few months then it worsened to the point that I could no longer even walk, I needed a wheelchair. Needless to say, my guitar playing days were over at that time, and the members of Cyanide went their ways. One has since passed away (Wesley N. House, R.I.P. brother, I love you!!) and another eventually left the music scene. Two others are still at it, and are extremely talented musicians.

I had numerous visits to the Mayo Clinic and they could find nothing wrong with me. They basically told me that I didn’t want to walk, and if I did really want to, I could. They sent me to numerous psychiatrists, and after I almost started to believe their bullshit, I stopped going. Then in early 1989 a friend of my Mom’s recommended a neurologist that had helped her with some back problems.

I met this new doctor in 1989 and he began to look deeper into whatever was going on with me. After a few stays in a Minneapolis hospital, he could find nothing wrong either. Then around 1992 I woke up one day with double vision. I went to my doctor in the Twin Cities and he ordered a bunch of tests, including an MRI of my head. This MRI showed some small scarring on the left side of my brain that was consistent with a neuro-muscular disease called Dystonia. After experimenting with all kinds of meds, my doc saw an article that spoke about a new drug used primarily in patients with Parkinson’s disease. The article stated that some docs saw amazing results with this med and Dystonia. I started on this drug, Artane, sometime in 1994. I was still in a wheelchair, and left my home only for appointments. That’s 7 years of social isolation and being wheelchair bound!!!

During those 7 years I studied 2 things intensely. One was the Bible, the other was guitar. I decided that if I was going to be wheelchair bound, I wanted to be as independent as I could, so I left my parents home and moved to Red Wing, MN in November of 1995 to attend a college for guitar building. I being in a wheelchair was tough and none of their equipment for guitar building was wheelchair friendly, so after my 1st year I was flunking out. I decided to go for a degree in computer support, which I did.

By 1996, thanks to the Artane, I was no longer in the chair, but used a cane to get around. By the time I graduated in Nov. of 1997, I was able to chuck the cane and only had "minor flare-ups" with Dystonia.

In January 1998 I was hired by Manpower to help with Mayo Clinic’s Y2K program, updating older computers to avoid any possible problems with the Y2K scare. After the updates were finished, Mayo kept me on working mostly on installing new computers throughout their campuses in Minnesota. My contract with Manpower expired on Dec. 31st, 1999 and Mayo chose not to renew it.

In January of 2000, I was hired with a company that cleaned carpets, furniture, drapes among other duties, for hotel chains nationwide. It was a pretty cool job as I became a crew leader and we would travel from city to city across the U.S. cleaning these hotels. We were in teams of 3 and we usually had 3 days to get the hotels done. I worked out a system that got the job done in1 to 1 ½ days so we had time to sight see as we wished. I was able to visit the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, The Golden Gate Bridge, the Grand Canyon, spent 3 weeks in Las Vegas, saw concerts at Red Rocks Amphitheater in Denver among other things. After about 8 months I started missing friends, family and most of all, playing guitar. I quit and came back to Rochester, MN.

After a few months of job seeking, I landed a position with All Systems Installation in Rochester, MN. They had a contract with Treasure Island Resort and Casino to wire up their new office buildings and some other upgrades in the casino area. We wired up everything from computers, to phones to closed circuit TV, and other such things. After 6 months the job at Treasure Island was done and almost all 6 of us from Rochester were laid off. So they basically hired some new guys so they could start us on the low end of the pay scale, and when the job was done they laid us off.

That brings us to March of 2001, when I got hired on with Adair Electric in Rochester, basically doing the same thing I did with All Systems. I mainly worked at the Mayo Clinic but also did other businesses and private homes as well.

On March 9th, 2001, I met an amazing woman named Megan while jamming in a friend’s basement (Mel Johnston). We kind of hit it off and started dating. After many incredibly awesome nights spent mostly at the North Star Bar, we found out that we were going to have twins!!! I thought, "Oh shit, we need to get married". So on Sept. 14th of 2001 we did just that!
On Feb. 1st, 2002, we welcomed Jacob and Joshua Rolbiecki into this world, identical twins at that!!!! In May of that year my wife Megan got an awesome opportunity to work for a company that works with organ donations. We talked about it and decided that the offer was too good to turn down so we decided that I would become a stay-at-home dad and she would go off to work.
Everything was going great for us and in April of 2003 I started giving private guitar lessons to help with extra income. Fast forward to January 14th, 2005. On that day my family welcomed Abigail Rolbiecki into this world. Now I had 3 at home to take care of!!! Life was great, and I loved it.

Then, in early April of 2007 I started having this tingling sensation in my left hand. I figured it was due to over practicing my guitar playing, trying to improve my playing for my band Stir. This tingling would continue for about 2 weeks and I thought it was Carpel Tunnel. During that 2 weeks Megan kept on me about going in to see my doctor. I finally relented and went in. At the time I went in I had a minor cough. My doctor put me through several Carpel Tunnel type tests, but nothing fell in place for that diagnosis. Since I had the cough my doc suggested we do a chest x-ray, so we did. Later that day he called and said there were some suspicious areas and that they needed to do a CT scan to find out what was up. A couple days after the CT scan he called back and asked me to come in to talk. I told him, since it sounds kind of bad just tell me on the phone. So I got Megan and we put the phone on speaker. "This is not good" the doc said. "It looks like some type of Lymphoma, but we’ll need to do more tests to nail it down." After 2 biopsies they confirmed a diagnosis of Stage 4 Diffuse Large B Cell Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I started my 1st round of 6 cycles of R-Chop chemo-therapy in May of ’07. A few weeks after my final round of R-Chop my PET scan showed no signs of the Lymphoma, I WAS CURED!!! Or so I thought. I had a recheck PET scan in Jan. of ’08. My doc said it showed 2 small areas and that it was not necessarily Lymphoma and wanted me to come back in 3 months for another PET scan. After I got home and thought about it for awhile I was like, there was no way I could wait that long, what if it is lymphoma? I called my doc and said I wanted a biopsy A.S.A.P. He agreed and after a few days I was told that the lymphoma had returned.
I recently finished 2 rounds of I.C.E. chemotherapy and am scheduled for a Stem-Cell transplant in early April to try and cure me of this incredibly horrid disease. I spoke to my doctor about all this and basically said, let me know WTF is up, am I going to die from this? Please be honest about your opinion. He said that his main job is Stem-Cell transplants, we are not even close to me dying and my prognosis is very good.

So there you go, my journey through life up to now. I consider myself one of the luckiest guys in the world no matter what happens, because throughout all of this I have had the rare opportunity to find out how wonderful my life really is. I have an amazing wife, 3 incredible kids that I would do ANYTHING for, a great extended family and many wonderful friends.
Peace to you all,
Steven M.